Behind in life

How To Stop Feeling Behind In Life


“I’m so far behind in life,” I told God as tears rolled down my face. I wish I could tell you I had this wild encounter with God, as I drifted off to sleep that night, but I didn’t. I just cried myself to sleep.

My friends my age have husbands, babies, and homes all while I’m trying to figure everything out. I was also frustrated with the growth of my blog and felt it should be doing more.

I realized that maybe to some I’m behind. At 35 if I could go back in life and change some things I would, especially how long I stayed with my ex. If you want to read more about that, click here. But the truth is that to Jesus, I’m not behind.

I hear this often from other women. I’m not where I want to be. I thought by now I would have a house or kids, I thought my business would take off. I thought…. fill in the blank.

Let’s dig into why we feel behind in life and how to change it.

Feeling Behind In Life

The reason we feel behind in life is quite simple.

For years of our lives, we are subjected to milestones, growth tracks, on a path to graduating, and the whole time we are on the same trajectory as our peers…until we aren’t.

After high school, we either join the workforce, join the service, or go to some type of higher education.

But then after that, our lives can well look different.

We see friends and co-workers buy homes, get married, and have children, as we sit in our childless apartments or homes with the only male in our lives either our pets, siblings, or the guy we aren’t interested in.

For some, the heartache of the dreams and the hopes not working out is their “behind” in life. Maybe that’s the IVF treatment that didn’t work, the divorce you didn’t see coming, the loss of the job you held for years, or the job you desperately wanted not working out.

Photo from pexels

But, what happens if we stop and look at life as an adventure? The one that Jesus is driving, while we have our feet out of the car window, relaxing. We are supposed to help with figuring out the next destination according to the world, but we are just enjoying where we are. We are mapping our own lives, our own paths. The one that we are in control of.

The one that Jesus is driving and we are along for the ride.

When You Feel Behind In Life

When you are feeling behind in life, remember who is driving the car. Jesus is! But when times are tough and the emotions are getting the best of us, it can be challenging to remember you aren’t in the driver’s seat.

Here are three areas that have helped me to focus on when I start to feel like I want to hop in the driver’s seat instead of enjoying the ride.

Areas Of Your Life

How do I feel about my current life? For me, this comes down to my visual everyday life, like how the interior of my home feels and looks.

Am I diving into my hopes and dreams? If not, am I going after the hopes and dreams that God has placed on my heart in order to help others?

Am I spending time and investing in relationships that are important to me?

Areas Of Health

Another area to think about is your health and wellness. 

How am I feeling about my overall health?

Am I investing in the time to eat healthy, exercise, and spend time with Jesus? If I’m not, what could I do differently? You may be surprised just how much focusing here helps when you’re feeling behind.

Areas Of Growth And Development

And finally, think about how you’re growing and changing during this time.

Am I attending to the things that are important to me? This could be taking a class for something that I enjoy,  in those hopes and dreams.

Am I putting off something simply because I’m waiting on what I thought my life needs to be?

How do I feel about my current feelings? Feelings are just feelings. Some fade like the wind. For me, acknowledging my feelings is important, but I don’t stay there. If you are struggling with your current life and feel like you need someone to talk to, invest in a life coach or a trained therapist.

What Happens When You Stop Feeling Behind In Life

When you stop feeling behind in life you start to enjoy your life.

You stop the Instagram comparing.

You invest in yourself and your goals, and dare I say dreams.

You take advantage of where you are and embrace everything you currently have.

You take that road trip, you write that blog post, you interview for that job, and you open up that business. You invest in your calling. your purpose, and you step into the person God created you to be.

You become you!

If you are struggling with where you are in your life, and feel like you need an extra boost of confidence to step into that dream, to go the extra mile to step into that calling, I’m offering a free half-hour life coaching session to women who feel they just need someone to help them get to where God has called them to be.

If this is you, feel free to contact me at

If you want to hear more from brokenutilnow, feel to subscribe to the blog and follow us on Instagram at brokenuntilnow. 


Ashley Marie

Here are a few other blog posts for you to, explore:

DIY Wellness Retreat At Home

Planner Tips For Beginners

3 Tips To Having Faith In God

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